Call It the ‘Covid 19’
A photo of Jennifer Garner in overalls promoting her Once Upon a Farm kids’ food line led an Instagram commenter to speculate on Garner’s pregnancy. The actress immediately shut that down.
“I am 48, have three healthy kids, and am not—and never will be—pregnant. We can lay that pupper to rest,” Garner responded, as captured by the Comments By Celebs account. “Have I gained the Covid 19? Possibly. But that is another story 😂🍕🌮🍩🍫🍷”
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Keep It Real (and Make It Awkward)
Even on the internet, it’s best to abide by the rule “Don’t ask a woman if she’s pregnant unless you literally deliver the baby yourself.” When a commenter asked Haddish “u pregnant?” on an Instagram of the star in the gown, she gave them the virtual equivalent of a withering eyeroll: “No, just getting fat.”
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BLAME IT ON THE GLUTEN
The singer is no stranger to setting the record straight when it comes to pregnancy rumors.
After fans began pregnancy speculation after the singer tweeted in February 2019 that she had “The Biggest Secret” (not album related) to share with them, Halsey put them in their places.
“People think my last tweet is me hinting I’m pregnant, which means I’m either: a. Gaining weight B. Acting weird than usual,” she wrote. “Jokes on u, I’m doing BOTH! However STILL not pregnant!”
In November 2019, Halsey set the record straight again when she was photographed with new boyfriend Evan Peters while on a date. The two were seen touching her stomach, but the singer said it’s not what you think.
“Still not pregnant. Still just allergic to gluten. Still love pancakes.” she wrote in one tweet.
“Is it a boy? Is it a girl? It’s pancakes.” she joked in another tweet.
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PROMOTE YOUR WORK
“Rumors I’m pregnant? Yeah, I’m pregnant with #LG6,” Gaga tweeted about her new album when gossip swirled in March 2019.
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CONFIRM THAT THE RUMORS AREN’T, IN FACT, TRUE
When rumors started circulating that Jessica Biel was pregnant with baby #2 … she called hubby Justin Timberlake just to make certain she wasn’t, she told Ellen DeGeneres. “I heard that and I called Justin. I was like, ‘Are we [having another baby]? No. Oh, okay, cool,” she joked. “He usually knows more than I do about everything.”
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Nicki Minaj doesn’t simply shoot down baby rumors – she reminds you where babies come from. (And reminds you of her real name, which is always a surprise.) “No matter wut he, or anyone else says, Onika Tanya Maraj won’t b pushing anyone1 out her vajayjay, until she’s married. Now check that,” the rapper Tweeted, shutting down buzz that she was pregnant with then-boyfriend Meek Mill’s baby.
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BLAME RYAN SEACREST
He’s one of the most powerful men in Hollywood – of course he’s to blame. “I bet Ryan Seacrest started the rumor,” Giuliana Rancic said in 2008 when pregnancy buzz began. “And now when I do get pregnant, no one will care.”
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THROW SOME SOCIAL MEDIA SHADE
In light of rumors that Kylie Jenner was eight months pregnant, the reality star took to Twitter to shut the whole thing down in 140 characters (or less). “People been thinking I’m pregnant for 8 months now … CLEARLY I’m not pregnant!” Basic logic: Pregnancy can’t last forever.
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EXPLOIT THE HIDDEN MEANING OF PUNCTUATION
“No I’m not pregnant.” Kim Kardashian West kept it simple and angry in her four-word Tweet, which ended in that passive aggressive period. (Five months later, though, she was happy to share some big news.)
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RECRUIT YOUR MOM
“I’m here to clear the rumors up. The truth is that it’s not Beyoncé that’s pregnant. It’s me,” Tina Knowles told Ellen DeGeneres in 2010 (long before Blue Ivy’s arrival), addressing reports that her daughter and Jay Z were expecting. “I’m kidding y’all. With all the rumors, by now I should have five or six grandchildren.”
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DON’T LET THE CRAZY GET TO YOU
“I used to get offended, like ‘Do I look fat today?’ or ‘Why are they saying that?’ But they just say it,” Khloé Kardashian lamented in 2014. “Before I was like, ‘Do I have a baby bump? Is my belly sticking out?’ But no.”
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WRITE AN ESSAY
Jennifer Aniston used the power of the pen to slam pregnancy rumors and the incessant scrutiny of her body. “For the record, I am not pregnant. What I am is fed up,” the actress wrote in a scathing essay titled “For the Record” posted on The Huffington Post. “This past month in particular has illuminated for me how much we define a woman’s value based on her marital and maternal status,” she continued. “The sheer amount of resources being spent right now by press trying to simply uncover whether or not I am pregnant (for the bajillionth time… but who’s counting) points to the perpetuation of this notion that women are somehow incomplete, unsuccessful, or unhappy if they’re not married with children.”
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JUST TELL PEOPLE TO LEAVE YOUR BELLY ALONE
Fans got caught up in pregnancy speculation after Camila Cabello posted a photo in which her hand was resting on her stomach with the caption, “You’re still the only thing I did right.” The singer cleared the air in the comments, writing, “Guys, don’t be crazy. I’VE BEEN TOURING AMERICA EATING DELICIOUS FOODS LEAVE ME AND MY BELLY ALONE!”
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REMIND PEOPLE THAT BALLOONS CAN MEAN MANY THINGS
After false reports claimed she was expecting a baby with boyfriend Chris Martin, Dakota Johnson set the record straight on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. “The only thing I’m pregnant with is a lot of really good ideas. But not any babies,” she said. The Suspiria star went on to explain that the rumors had started because of the presence of pink and blue balloons at her birthday party. “It was my birthday, and there were balloons that happened to be pink and blue and so then I was pregnant,” she joked. “[I got] a lot of attention. More than just having it being my birthday!”
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After a tabloid reported Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth might be expecting based on some photos of the singer, she used an of-the-moment meme to issue a silly denial.
“I’m not ‘egg-expecting’ but it’s ‘egg-celent’ to hear everyone is so ‘happy for us’… we’re happy for us too!” Cyrus tweeted — poking fun at the world record egg which surpassed Kylie Jenner‘s first snapshot of daughter Stormi as the most-liked Instagram of all time.
“‘Egg-cited’ for this next chapter in our lives… Now, can everyone leave me alone and go back to staring at an egg,” Cyrus added.
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MAKE ‘EM LAUGH … AND FEEL BAD
When a commenter wrote “U pregnant” on a photo of Tiffany Haddish at the Golden Globes, she had the perfect reply to put said follower in their place (and make things really awkward): “no just getting fat.”
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KINDLY INFORM EVERYONE THAT YOU’RE SIMPLY LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE
Pregnancy rumors started swirling after Halle Berry stepped out in a formfitting sequined dress in June 2017, but the actress was quick to point out that if she had anything in her belly, it was simply a food baby. “Can a girl have some steak and fries??” she captioned a cheeky Instagram photo, accompanied by a winking emoji. Yes you can, Halle; treat yourself.
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SAY SOMETHING BEFORE THE RUMORS EVEN BEGIN
In a 2018 interview with Glamour, the Oscar winner admitted to having been body-shamed in the past and feeling like “there’s a storm to get ahead of.” So instead of dealing with the speculation and questions as she embarked on a press tour for her role in Ocean’s 8, Hathaway explained her body changes in an Instagram post on April 5.
“I am gaining weight for a movie role and it is going well. To all the people who are going to fat shame me in the upcoming months, it’s not me, it’s you,” wrote Hathaway, who’s been subjected to pregnancy rumors in the past.
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KEEP IT SHORT
Shortly after fans found out Amy Schumer and husband Chris Fischer had wed in a surprise ceremony, the I Feel Pretty star made it a point to address her big day while simultaneously putting all those pregnancy rumors to rest. “No I am not pregnant,” she wrote on Instagram.
But that wasn’t the first time the comedian sparked pregnancy rumors. While attempting to tip off fans that she and stylist Leesa Evans are launching a clothing line together, fans paid extra close attention to her pose — it appeared to some that the star was pointing at a baby bump — which prompted Schumer to post a follow-up video to address the claims.
“I am not pregnant. I am… not pregnant,” Schumer said as she sips what looks like an alcoholic beverage. “It looked like I was pointing to a bump or something but I’m not. Leesa Evans and I have created a clothing line for all sizes and shapes and at a chill price point. That’s what I was trying to allude to but thank you for thinking of my womb.”
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FOUR WORDS OR LESS IS IDEAL
Ashley Graham was quick to respond to a user who commented on the star’s Instagram photo, which showcased the model’s belly. “Good morning … Ashley!! Looking good … Baby bump … :))),” read the comment. Graham flawlessly replied, “That’s just called fat.”
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GET THE WORD OUT ON YOUR INSTAGRAM STORY
Over Memorial Day Weekend in 2018, photos of Lili Reinhart circulated on social media — with fans wondering whether the Riverdale star might be expecting. That’s when Reinhart took matters into her own hands. “It’s unfortunate that one unflattering photo of my stomach circulating the internet causes hundreds of people to think that I’m pregnant,” she wrote on Instagram. “Nope. Not pregnant.”
Reinhart continued, “This is just my body. And sometimes I’m bloated. Sometimes and unflattering photo is taken of me. Sometimes I go through periods of time where I gain weight.”
“My body is something that I will NEVER apologize for,” Reinhart added. “My body will constantly go through change. And so will yours. And that’s fine. So let’s not put so much time and effort into caring about a stranger’s figure.”
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