DEAR DEIDRE: THE ring I wore on my wedding day was intended for my husband’s ex-girlfriend. I only discovered the truth when we returned from our honeymoon.
My husband’s aunt was visiting and made a throwaway comment about my wedding band looking good on me despite being made for someone else.
I am 29 and my husband is 32. We have been together for three years. He had been with his ex for six years and they were planning to marry.
I’m not sure why but they split up and things ended really badly.
This woman has sent me threatening messages. I ignored them as best I could and eventually she gave up harassing me.
I’m devastated that my husband’s family all knew about the origins of this ring but kept it a secret.
I am unsure how to take this. I feel very distant. I am having second thoughts about him. How can I get past this?
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DEIDRE SAYS: It could be the design of this ring appealed to your husband or perhaps there were financial reasons.
He no doubt held back this information as he didn’t want you to be hurt.
Some families see jewellery as family heirlooms, so the ownership stays with the man and they get passed along.
Talk to your husband and explain this secret has dented your confidence in him and discuss how you can communicate better.
My support pack Relationship MOT will help.
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